I had high hopes for this week. I’ve trained like an absolute demon all week, my food has been great (apart from last night when poor preparation resulted in a packet of Twisties for dinner… under calories but hardly nutritious). I have a deficit of 2051 calories based on BMR – Food consumed and had burned 4304 cals via exercise so that should be almost a 1kg loss based purely on the sums. I hadn’t had a huge loss on the scales last week, so I was all prepared for a good result and to smash through the 20kgs lost barrier. Life it seems had other ideas. Jumped on the scales and lo and behold 200g lost. Thats it. 200 measly grams. I’ve had bowel movements that weighed more than that! What’s worse was 100g short of the 20kg loss. To my credit I was only upset by this for a few seconds, before my new brain switched in to gear. No worries I though, so what the scales suck, I’ll grab the measuring tape. It’s week 8 of Round 2, time to do my measurements. I’ve been getting loads of compliments from people on how I look, my clothes are looser, I HAVE to have lost some cm since I measured 4 weeks ago.
WRONG! Bust measurement UP 1cm, which nicely counteracted the 1cm down off my waist, leaving me with a net loss of 2cm which came off 1 arm. Lost absolutely nothing off my hips legs etc. I couldn’t believe it. I was absolutely gutted 😦 I admit my response to the tape was nowhere near as logical and sensible as my response to the scales. After all, everyone always says, if you don’t see the results on the scales, don’t worry, you’ll get them on the tape and its more important that you measure smaller than that you weigh less. So here I am with crap results on both. Usually I’m able to celebrate other people’s success even when it far outstrips mine. Not today though. Posts from people who “had a bad week with food and only managed to exercise 1 or 2 days but still lost 1kg” just upset me. How dare they get great results when I worked my butt off, including 3 1000cal+ burn days and got nothing. Worse was when the measurements started being put out there. There are people who have lot more cm in 8 weeks of this round than I have lost since I started this journey. It’s not fair. I’m not saying they don’t deserve their results but I work just as hard so don’t I deserve results too?
So that was my childish, foot stomping mindset that I started the day with. I rebelled. I didn’t organise lunch knowing full well that would mean I would have to buy it (ended up buying a chicken wrap which wasnt too bad but still not ideal). I debated skipping the gym and just sulking on the couch. Lucky for me, a very wise woman pointed out that it’s not always about the numbers. She’s done several rounds and had huge success but the numbers have stalled a bit for her. She however returned to oztag today and was the fittest person on the field. and that was after she’d done a gym session. She’s right. I dragged my sorry butt to the gym tonight and did a Kimax class. 6 months ago that class would have killed me. Literally. I would have had a heart attack 10 min in… IF I survived the warm up. Not tonight though. I punched, kicked, elbowed and knee’d that bag like a demon. I took all my anger and frustration on that bag. When we did our runs between rounds and were told to sprint I ran flat out. I didnt jog like a lot of the others in the class and I certainly didnt walk, and then I was straight back on to the bag ready to go again. All the way to the end of the class. 1 hour and 600 cals later, sure I was dripping with sweat, but I felt GREAT. I had given it everything and I was still standing. I am STRONG. I am FIT. I am AWESOME, and if the scales and measuring tape can’t see that well stuff them.
It’s not always about the numbers